The Grand National Championships

May 19, 2009

Things I want to see happen.

Filed under: Basketball is played by tall guys,Draft Nerd — by Andrew @ 6:07 pm

In an NBA lottery. Magic can happen. You can see the Bulls fall ass backwards into one of the true future stars of the game. You can see Larry Harris crap his pants as he has a choice of Chris Paul and Deron Williams, and goes with Andrew Bogut. (Yeah, hindsight, but at least I wasn’t fired up for Bogut when he was drafted.)

But here’s a quick list of five things that needs to happen in the lottery.

1) Somebody needs to use Dave Winfield as a good luck charm. After all, if an authority like George Steinbrenner would call him Mr. May.

2) Fred Hoiberg. The Mayor of Ames, Iowa is the sort of non-threatening guy that would bring in key demos.

3) Stephen A. Smith. I’m sorry. I miss loud noises and cheez doodles.

4) Bill Simmons as host. Can we agree on this? The draft lottery needs less boo-yahs and more karate kid references.

5) We need a referee to whistle someone for a touch foul. Oh wait, that’s every other playoff game.

Meh. Sorry.

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