Sure, I could go and ape a Bill Hickisan rant about how you all are nothing more than a mere virus with shoes. But I am a simpler man. My hate can be distilled into a simpler, issue oriented logic.
So know you’re asking, if I have made you into a reasonably successful blog of some renown, why are you drinking the haterade on us? It’s simple, really.
Remember this summer? Remember when a young upstart blog first came up with the concept of putting 32 annoying ESPN personalities together in tournament form? remember when Stephen A. won the thing? (That one you probably don’t). Well, we parodized the concept from this idiotic thing called Who’s Now?
“Hey! Let’s discuss the intangible qualities of Shaun White vs. Steve Nash! Brilliant!”
See, it was not brilliant. It was bad television. Bad bad television. And now ESPN has their excuse to bring it back next year.
Look, I know it probably wasn’t many of you that did it. I know that if you did go, you did it for educational purposes only. (I was tempted once or twice to find out who won, but I was strong!) But now it’s going to come back next summer.
And I’m going to be fooled into doing Who’s Hack 2? I’m even likely going to do an electric boogaloo reference. And this will be bad for all involved.
Because we will recycle more jokes than Bill Simmons! Oh!
Such wit! I am a regular Dennis Miller. BABE!