Ten Things that confuse me…

I know, I know. I don’t have my energies focused, and I apologize. I’m going to do a mini-rant of several things that baffle me. So here we go.

10) Why are we firing offensive coordinators right before the season?

I mean really. We’re right before the season starts, and three teams have found a way to fire their offensive coordinator. And you know what? That’s brilliant. You have two teams who couldn’t bring together a new offense without lasting the preseason. Cripes, alfridey get a new offense.

9) The Bucks have failed the offseason.

You have two players under 25 with talent and intrigue who are restricted free agents? You make moves to try and get under the cap. And you don’t keep either. Because of Scott Skiles. Awesome.

8) LaGarrette Blount.

That Boise State game was odd. If this was the NFL? Chip Kelly would be on the hot seat. No other top 25 team will ever come into Boise. But you’re taking away the man’s right to a future with a season-long suspension. You have guys who swing helmets who get four game suspensions. So yeah. Nuts to that.

7) Could Jonathan Crompton have been the problem?

Bowling Green put up numbers Tennessee could have only dreamed about last year. 31 points. I mean, wow.

6) Maybe I was wrong about Temple being this year’s Buffalo.

Though Villanova is stealthy in the One dubs because it plays in the same division in Richmond. Good looking out, money.

5) But this was awesome.

PWNED!

4) Oh Michigan…

When naming a true Freshman starter is a relief, you’re an irrelevant joke. And I love you for it.

*e-hugs Rich Rodriguez*

3) The Cleveland Browns are comedy gold.

Rumors of Jamal Lewis getting cut. Still no official starting QB. If it wasn’t for seven other teams being a mess? This would be awesome.

2) The seven other teams that are a mess?

Buffalo, Kansas City, Tampa Bay, Denver, Oakland, Detroit, and Philadelphia. I may be reaching on Philly, but there are cracks in the facade.

1) The Brewers need to find a way to flip Fielder this off-season.

Sorry about my damn luck, because Fielder is awesome, but they can’t live on a diet of Looper and Suppan. They need talent. Or at the very least the bargain guys who came up big at one point.

WHEE!

I hear firescottskiles.com isn’t a taken domain…

I’ve been willing to give John Hammond the benefit of the doubt. They’ve gone younger and cheaper with more flexibility. They’ve found a way to get me kind of excited for the Bucks as a fun to watch team that would be a lot more entertaining then their record indicated.

That is…until today.

Because when you have someone with at least six illegitimate kids finding a seemingly prodigous ability to rack up fouls as a major character flaw, you have to bend over backwards to make him happy. So you trade two of the most potentially exciting Bucks on the team for the Argentinian 2-Guard answer to Luke Ridnour and Loco Roko.

Carlos Delfino is a tall two who can hit an occasional three who spent last year in Russia because he’s the sort of guy who has no glaring skill or weakness to his game. Now he’s probably better than Sonny Weems, but for a two year deal with an option for three? Send his ass back to Russia.

And Roko Uric. He’s a lead guard. He actually has some savior faire when he has the ball in his hands, and as Skiles wants, he is a good defender. But since he’s useless off ball, he can’t play the two. And he’s also here for two years.

Maybe there’s a higher floor for Delfino and Uric, but the upside? Please. Amir or Weems doesn’t emerge? We have no issues. They gone.

This trade feels like something Skiles demanded. More of a mistake proof team for two high energy players who could help give this team an identity with less money on the docket for 2010. I know, we’re not going to get the superstar in free agency.

But here’s the thing, sportsfans, if Scott Skiles is still around by the time Hammond has to consider the option on Delfino? I will make the douchiest move ever.

I will put my basketball fandom on free agency, because clearly the good Dr. John Hammond doesn’t know what he’s doing.

The Milwaukee Bucks: 1080p Black and White Basketball.

It seems as if the Milwaukee Bucks are in a deep state of disunity. You have a team that seems to keep grabbing pieces for a seven seconds or less offense. I mean you could get together a five of Sessions/Jennings, Meeks/Weems, Mbah a Moute, Alexander, and Amir Johnson and run another team out of the gym.

John Hammond has brought a lot of interesting pieces together in an effort to restart the Bucks. And this has made the Bucks offseason one that you cannot put a letter grade on by October. There are a lot of pieces, and if we had a digital coach? These pieces would be a spectacular fit. That’s the other problem.

Scott Skiles loves Luke Ridnour. It’s annoying on so many levels. Scott Skiles will probably start Bruce Bowen and ride Kurt Thomas until he inevitably breaks down. I mean, look at all the pieces the Bulls had that degenerated under the Skiles regime. You’ve got that whole thing to worry about.

But you know what? We’re not done. There’s a long time between now and training camp. Some would say we need to waive Weems to get a shot at Sessions. Some would say we need to waive Bowen and trade Ridnour. Some are saying we’re going to let Sessions walk. I’ll be honest, I want to like this. I’m talking myself into this.

But there’s still moves to be made or not made. I’m not going to walk away on this team just yet. But I’m still tentative as to bless this mess.

But we could see a ten game winning streak the moment Scott Skiles gets fired this offseason.

The Bucks decided to let Villanueva go free…

What the fuck was that? Huh? You go off and you start to a plan. You try to change the future of the team. Get flexible. Become leaner and meaner.

And I was there for every step of the way. I got blocked off of Bill Simmons’ Twitter account because of it. Yi and Bobby Simmons becoming Amir Johnson and two old Spurs? I understood.

Because there was one thing the Bucks needed to do this offseason. They could have reached on Jrue Holiday. They could have traded Michael Redd for two bad contracts. I would have understood. Because there was one goal.

Keep CV31 and Sessions.

Well that’s not going to happen. Odds are we’re going to see Alopecia Pete have the same sort of success as Mo Williams did on the same team. So that’s awesome. They made the wrong decision if it came down between him and Skiles. But I am going to leave it be for right now.

Just, on the infinitesimal chance Amir Johnson is listening? Get your shine on. If the Bucks are goin gto be good, you need to fill the shoes.

The Milwaukee Bucks on draft day…

They have a very interesting decision to make here. Really, I know most of the people in America could not give a crap about this team. But this is a team that has the potential to look a lot different. You could see a fading superstar moving on. You may have a lady or the tiger decision made with some young talent.

And you have two picks in a weak draft for overall depth. So, there’s a lot of reasons to watch what the Bucks are planning on doing.

1) The inevitable Michael Redd trade rumors.

The package is not going to wow the Bucks fan. Not anymore. Maybe they can get a fading superstar in Kirilenko, but it’s more likely they get an expiring contract or two in the Etan Thomas and Boobie Gibson phylum. (Redd to NYC for Harrington and Jared Jeffries? Could happen. I don’t think the Bucks are going to take a year over the luxury tax, but Redd may be able to be had for less than you think.

2) Who do the Bucks keep?

You have a 24 year old power forward who has been solidly successful in the pros, who has not his athletic prime yet. You also have a 23 year old point guard whose had some massive games in his professional career with a scoring upside. Now, Villanueva is a restricted free agent. Sessions is restricted (as well). The draft class at forward is not that deep. (If Jordan Hill doesn’t fall to 10? You aren’t going to see them draft B.J. Mullens or Earl Clark.) And Luke Ridnour can be a one-year stopgap if necessary…

3) So who’s the point guard?

Suffice it to say, I hope that Jeff Teague goes back to school. He has great skills, but he doesn’t have the polish to handle the Scott Skiles experience. I like Eric Maynor and Ty Lawson, but I just don’t see them being on an equal level with Sessions. So, if the Bucks choose between Brandon Jennings or Jonny Flynn? I don’t see them making a mistake.

4) Or do they try to get in at the end of the round?

Because the third tier of point guards? Darren Collison, Patty Mills, Rodrique Beaubois. Like I said. Deep point guard class.

5) And finally?

Notes to John Hammond: Jerel McNeal in round 2. Or Jack McClinton (as the MONGA in training). Your call.

It’s time for the Bucks to trade for Leandro Barbosa…

I mean, Ridnour’s hurt. And Barbosa actually has some defensive stopper in him as well. And the Bucks do have a glut in the Frontcourt.

So here’s the idea.

To the Suns: Charlie Villanueva and Damon Jones
To the Bucks: Leandro Barbosa and Alando Tucker

Why this works? Villanueva is a versatile tweener who can contribute as a giant 3 or a pretty good four. Also, the light has turned on somewhat for him.

And for the Bucks, it works on multiple levels. One, a Sessions-Barbosa-Jefferson-Alexander front four could brink back some form of the seven seconds or less. Also, Alando Tucker is live, local, and latebreaking.

And I hate Skiles. This would gaslight the shit out of him.

What do these injuries mean for the Bucks?

If they can get James Harden? Good things. I know, I despise Scott Skiles. But year 2 is when they listen at their peak efficency. In his previous two stops, he’s had his teams at a .597 winning percentage.

Not saying they’re gonna get all the way live, but with the luck they’ve been having with second round picks? There is a chance. But trade Ridnour! Sessions is a force of nature!

Aaaaaaah!

So I thought I was brilliant…

I know, big surprise, right?

Anyway, every so often I get a streak of general manager in me and I go looking for a trade that I would make. Like for example? A package of Clay Buchholz, Manny Delacarmen, and Oscar Tejada would potentially be fair market value for the Prince.

But I was in a basketball mood. And I noticed something. The Bucks could move a young player with value and an expiring contract or two and generate something of value. And the right package of three could get a solid if overpriced player. So I went to the ESPN Trade Machine and went to work.

And then I found it. Charlie Villanueva, Damon Jones, and Fransisco Elson for Marcus Camby. Crazy enough it just might work. But then I realized. The Clippers are 15 deep. And then I realized, that there are only 12 active spots.

3 Clippers are injured? What is this? And then I hit on another joke of the NBA. Everybody on the taxi squad is supposed to be “injured.” I mean, COME ON.

This has been, Cool Story Bro! Starring Me! Andrew!

The Mike Conley Experience…

Mike Conley had a high upside going into the draft. He was the Shawn Michaels to Greg Oden’s Big Daddy Cool. He looked like another possible Chris Paul in the eyes of some. And he was drafted in the Top 5.

However? At this juncture, Ramon Sessions is a better player. I will say this again. Ramon Sessions is a better player. Hell, he’s a better player than Luke Ridnour, but Scott Skiles is a racist, so let’s move on.

See, Sessions is a master distributor. He has the ability to run an offense from the mid-90′s Fratello Cavaliers all the way to seven seconds or less. The big bugaboo is his jumper, but he’s improving. He’s not a stopper. But he’s not useless as a defender.

But his contract is going to be coming up, and the Bucks have been burned by MLE idiocy of previous administrations, so they are going to get busted up again here. Why? Because until Mike Conley hits the weight room like a big boy? Ramon Sessions is a better player.

I mean, there has to be a reason why Kyle freaking Lowry keeps taking his job, right? He’s a Skiles guy. Skiles would love his defense. But he has nowhere near the potential upside of Mike Conley.

And did I mention that in this deal we would be giving up on the upside of Joe Alexander? Sure, he hasn’t shown much. But with me being wrong on Mbah a Moute, as well as Jefferson, Villanueva, and Scott Skiles favorite Malik Allen? How much opportunity to show himself has he had this season?

Of course, I could be wrong. Conley could find religion after he travels to the dessicated hellhole known as Milwaukee. Alexander could be a nothing but a bust. Sessions’ ceiling isn’t much higher than his floor.

But I doubt it. I trust my first instinct on NBA trade rumors. This one stinks.

30 Teams in 30 Hours!!! Milwaukee Bucks

Were will I start? My home team. The mixture of Bench Olympians, Scott Skiles, and a Kansas City Royalsesque inability not to blow-up the team as necessary. I mean it. Living on the off 7th seed is the equivalent of drunk fat and stupid.

The Coach? Scott Skiles. Fuck him. He’s analog on a digital team.

The Team Itself.

Joe Alexander: Quite Frankly? Joe Alexander is going to be a bust.
Malik Allen: Will inexplicably start over Charlie Villanueva.
Charlie Bell: Burned by the Mid Level Exception.
Andrew Bogut: Will average a triple double. The third category? The self high-five!
Fransisco Elson: The Dutch Anderson Varejao.
Matt Frieje: Voted most likely to be inexplicably awesome in April.
Dan Gadzuric: The Dutch Jerome James.
Adrian Griffin: Defense and shitty.
Richard Jefferson: Will suffer his season living alone in the Pfister with dignity.
Damon Jones: Will suffer a mysterious mitochondrial issue…until he comes off the cap.
Tyronn Lue: Will inexplicably make Ramon Sessions a third point guard.
Luc Richard Mbah A Moute: Will go off into the D-League and play defense. Will cause sharp pains in the saide of Bucks fan if and when CDR and Bill Walker show their skills.
Michael Redd: At once overrated and underrated. If he learns how to play second banana? He’ll rise like a phoenix for Jesus.
Luke Ridnour: Reminds Skiles of Skiles. He will drive and kick until he bleeds.
Ramon Sessions: The Ramon Sessions was a second round guard with excellent distributorial upside. Skiles is gonna fuck that up.
Charlie Villanueva: How can we sleep when the beds are burning?

So what do we expect? Same shit, different year. They miss the playoffs and draft Tyler Hansbrough.

Awesome.