LaTroy Hawkins is never going to be a Hall of Famer. You know it, I know it, the American People know it. All things being equal, LaTroy Hawkins is just an average joe middle reliever. Before the man became a Yankee? He’d be best known as the closer the year of the last Cubs collapse.
But now? Now he’s got something to be known for. You see, Yankee fans, like so many Harpies, have shouted LaTroy Hawkins into changing his number. Why?
Because apparently, a man a notch or two above mediocre is in need of protection from so many Guidos who think that a career .833 OPS and generally acting like a punkass is worthy of being mentioned in the same breath as so many legends on the Yankee wall of fame.
Now, yes, that sentence was provocative. Paul O’Neill was much better as a Yankee than he was as a Red. He did get named to four all-star games (in which a Yankee named the roster in three). He did finish in the Top 5 of MVP Voting in 1994. And while he did provide some spectacular playoff moments? His career OPS in the playoffs? .838.
He’s like Geoff Jenkins, if a fanbase loved him. Really. Geoff Jenkins OPS is .841.
(And Paul O’Neill suddenly got good in 1994 after going to New York. It’s as if he got into Jim Leyritz’s upp– Naaah…our heroes of the late 90’s were crisp and clean with no caffeine, right?)
YEP!!
And of course, LaTroy Hawkins was wearing #21 for his own selfish reasons. He wanted to bring attention to Yankee fans of a Right Fielder who was more skilled than Mr. O’Neill. Better at the five tools. Better at the seven skills. Better at the charity work. Heart of the lion, arms like thunder.
How dare he? Roberto Clemente’s 3000 career hits are worth less than O’Neill’s 2105. Paul O’Neill was still better! He had 60 more steals! And he just destroys Clemente in the division series! Clemente couldn’t even get his team there, am I right?
Yeah. I know. Paul O’Neill is off the chain. I’m sorry. His number in pinstripes is a National Treasure. Just because some mediocrity wanted to show love for one of his heroes who died bringing much needed supplies to Nicaragua, doesn’t mean anything.
Paul O’Neill is God.
Everything else is second rate.
Go in peace.
Andrew
