Okay. Here’s the Thing.

I really don’t want this to seem like a whole sour grapes thing, because the fact is, I’m not great at doing two blogs. Even if one was just a guest post. I start looking at my work as gold leaf and it all pales in comparison.

And I am not here to declare war on Epic Carnival by any stretch. I do think they have talented bloggers, but the fact of the matter is that it is an experiment that seems to have gone awry.

And again, before we do this, let me reiterate, no grinding axe. Letting me go was for the best. I am just doing this as an Ombudmatharsis.

Issue #1: Too many writers.

If you take a look at Epic Carnival, they have more people there than a protected Major League Baseball roster. Of course, this is the hook, right? More writers than you can shake a stick at? In theory, it’s an excellent idea.

But the problem is that there are few real “talents” in the Blogfrican Serengeti. A lot of people are within that 6 to 8 range of skill. I’ve said it before. Timing and connections are the building blocks of a great blog. The talent is merely secondary unless you are a superstar.

(And for the record? I do not consider myself a superstar. Just really lucky.)

So what do you get when you bring together three bakers dozen worth of interchangeable parts? It’s something where nobody can emerge from the din of other voices to be a blogging superstar. It’s a whole lot of mediocre, that’s what it is. And yet?

Issue 2: The Daily Features.

You have 40+ voices, coming from diverse fields such as the feminine perspective to this sport called hock-e. You would figure every day brings something new. You would be incorrect. There are daily features outside of the obligatory link dump.

This is not a good idea. It is filler and the average reader sees it for what it is. A video of the day? A photoshop of the day? These are simply unnecessary. The readers will not care if you have two less posts.

The thing I have a love-hate relationship as a blogger with is the list post. You can make an easy post with them. You and I have done them. But we do not do them every day. Doing them every day is a bad thing.

The Five Tool Tool dmtshooter guy can make a pretty good list when he is so inspired. The top post list bears it out. Free market and all that. But again.

Making him do it every day only dilutes the man at his best, such as it is. 

Issue #3: The “Funny” Guys  

There’s a certain transitive property in the fun stuff. Poker is like comedy is like sex is like video games. Everybody thinks they are good at it, but nobody really is. (Unless you’re Chip Reese. He was great at poker. RIP HOMEY!)

Anyway. EC has two humorists, if you could call it that. Introducing Liston and Blog of Hilarity. Introducing Liston to put it simply, is a bastardization of Carlos Mencia’s act. Blog of Hilarity is like your buddy who you tolerate because they usually pick up the bar tabs. He has the worst jokes and timing. But when you’re sick of drinking Mad Dog 20/20 in your boxers you give him a call. 

Both are trump cards in the deck of EC.

Ugly, unfuckable trump cards.

Yeah. That’s it. That’s all I am going to say about the EC. I wish them luck.

Well, except for the “comedy portion.” It’s a world of suck and even twogirls1cup.com couldn’t save it. 

BYE!