Fantasy football is lame. It’s also really gay to whine and moan: OMG! I DRAFTED BADLY! MY MAGAZINE FAILED ME!! Keep this in mind. YOU SUCK!
Thankfully, I’m here to help. I will help you believe to achieve with next year’s top 5 fantasy qb’s!
The Grand National Championships bring you: 2008 FANTASY QB PICKS AS DUNGEONS AND DRAGONS CHARACTERS!
Tom Brady = A Chaotic Evil Elf Thief
Strength: 10
Dexterity: 9
Constitution: 14
Intelligence: 15
Charisma: 17
Wisdom: 12
While not the most elusive of the bunch, his solid constitution and high charisma scores more than make up for it. Woman want him. Men want to be him. If you are looking for a quarterback next year he is your first and best choice.
Derek Anderson = Lawful Good Fighter Dwarf
Strength: 15
Dexterity: 7
Constitiution: 17
Intelligence: 8
Charisma: 13
Wisdom: 11
Derek Anderson may not be the brightest quarterback in the bunch, but few are tougher. He has a strong charisma score for an elf, and he can lead a team unlike his back-up. True Neutral valkyrie Brady Quinn
Quinn: MAN PILE! ON ONE ON ONE!
We will do more of these soon..but to finish strong, we must show you the strongest part of Dungeons and Dragons:
Roger Goodell = 12 sided dice!
Roger Goodell is the essence of the force. You live by the dice, you die by the dice. Sure you can get into trouble for cheating ala the Patriots; but if you roll a winner on your saving throw, NOONE CARES!
Bellichick: You’re the best…AROUND!!!
Yes, we are huge nerds. HAPPY THANKSGIVING!
THE GRAND NATIONAL CHAMPIONSHIPS!
